(Student writing B2+) Challenges (samples)

Original

My most challenging period of life so far was taking interview to get a job because process of interview was too long.

It has the document screening, first interview with human resources employees, second interview with executives, third interview with foreign interviewer use in English, fourth interview with a CEO or executives, physical strength test and swimming 25 meters within 35 seconds and the last is medical examination.

It makes me very exhausted because it was my first time to take a job interview. However i always thought so positively, believe myself and never said to other people when i passed the each process as a superstition. In Korea, we believe when you have good news, don't tell that. If you tell your good news, it will be disappeared. And i think it was right.

Finally i got a job as a cabin crew. It is my happy memory, i decided to quit a job because of bad moments,though.

Corrected

The most challenging period of life so far was taking an interview to get a job as a cabin crew. The process of interview was simply too long.

It began with the document screening, then the first interview with human resources employees, then the second interview with the executives, then the third interview in English with the foreign interviewer, then the fourth interview with a CEO or executives, then the physical strength test and swimming 25 meters within 35 seconds, and the last of all came the medical examination.

Obviously, it made me utterly exhausted because it was my first time to take a job interview. However, I always tried to think positively, believe in myself and never told  others when I’d passed each stage of the process, out of superstition. In Korea, we believe when you have good news, don't tell others. If you tell your good news, it will disappear. And I think it was right.

Finally I did get a job as cabin crew. It is a happy memory. But you know what? I decided to quit the job in the end, because of some bad experiences.

Original

My big challenge has been this big trip in NZ.

When I was a university student, I had a dream to study abroad. But I was so lazy in preparing it, so I just nearly gave up to going.

When I was in 4th grade, I had to start thinking about my future.

I’d already decided to be a recruit after graduating and I also started looking for a job. I subsequently got a job in a supplement company and I was going there to train for recruitment. But one day I suddenly realized that I really wanted to go to abroad!! Because I only had one life and If I didn’t go now, I would regret it forever. So I determined to study abroad for a year. And fortunately my parents agreed with this idea and they encouraged me. I have to be grateful to them. After that, I talked with my company and declined the job offer.

So far I haven’t regretted coming here and I’m really satisfied with my decision. It was a big challenge for me but I have done 6 months so far and I feel my English has improved a lot.

But the best thing has been getting to know other country’s culture. It is so interesting for me.

As a result, I am happy with this challenge and proud of it.

Corrected

My big challenging has been this big trip in NZ.

When I was a university student, I had a dream to study abroad. But I was so lazy to prepare it, so I just nearly gave up to going.

When I was 4th grade, I had to start to think about my future. I already decided to be a recruit after graduate and I also started looking for a job. I consequently got a job in a supplement company and I was going there to train for recruit. But one day I suddenly realized that I really wanted to go to abroad!! Because my life is only once and If I didn’t go now, I would regret it ever. So I determined to study abroad for a year.

Fortunately my parents agreed with this idea and they pushed my back. I have to appreciate them. Then I talked with my company and declined the job.

So far I haven’t regretted to come here and I really satisfy my decision. It was a big challenging for me but I have done already for 6 months and I fell my English has improved a lot. But the best thing is I can know other country’s culture. It is so interesting for me.

As a result, I am happy with this challenging and proud of it.

Original

When I did my motorcycle driving license it was a really tough challenge for me.

The first step:  to pass my theory exam was not very hard just time-consuming, but as soon as the practice on the motorcycle started I became nervous and insecure about my whole decision. I actually rode the motorcycle into bush in my third lesson while I tried to turn but I was just too fast. After I got a little better I had to ride on the road - my horror imagination. It was not as bad as I had imagined but I was really stiff. I needed a lot of hot baths and relaxing time after those lessons because it was frightening but also fun and getting better every time. I was very self-critical and my teacher tried to make me understand that nobody starts as a professional but that practicing is important and I am one of his students that actually constantly improve. The only mistakes I make are silly mistakes. 

Every  time I spoke to my parents I was exaggerating about the difficulties I had and they often said they would be alright with me giving up, but as soon as I heard that it reminded me of my childhood where I had to quit ballet because of my asthma and school . My motivation to see something through I am passionate about and really want even though it is hard to learn sometimes kept me on the track. Also because I always do things people tell me not to do. When the final day arrived where I had my driving test my body was like a robot, I did not make any mistakes because the fear of failing was too big and I had the skills despite me having a little mental breakdown just before the test.  I had a nice lunch with my mum afterwards to celebrate the success.

Corrected

When I took my motorcycle driving license test it was a really tough challenge for me.

The first step was to pass my theory exam, which was not very hard - just time-consuming. But as soon as the practice on the motorcycle started I became nervous and insecure about my whole decision. I actually rode the motorcycle into a bush on my third lesson while taking a turn too fast.

After I’d got a little better I had to ride on the road - my worst nightmare. It was not as bad as I had imagined but I needed a lot of hot baths and relaxing time after those lessons due to the stiffness it caused. It was frightening but also fun and getting better every time. I was very self-critical and my teacher tried to make me understand that nobody starts as a professional and that practicing was important. The trainer told me that I was actually one of the students that constantly improved. The only mistakes I made were silly mistakes. 

Whenever I spoke to my parents I’d exaggerate the difficulties I had and they often said they would be alright with me giving up. But as soon as I heard that I’d be reminded of my childhood where I had to quit ballet because of my asthma and school. So my motivation to see something I am passionate about through, even though it is hard sometimes, kept me on the track. Besides, I always do things people tell me not to do.

When the final day arrived where I had my driving test my body worked like a robot. I did not make any mistakes because the fear of failing was too great and I had the skills despite having a little breakdown just before the test. 

I had a nice lunch with my mum afterwards to celebrate the success.

Original

 I consider, if I had to choose one especially challenging period in my life so far it would be the first semester at university. Although Most people are very excited about the first day at university, for me was a the toughest day in my life. The thing was that everyone knew each other in this place.

First of all, It was difficult to make friends, because I am from the other part of the city and they are almost all from the same place, also, school so that is the reason why they knew each other. Although I really love my career so that I could move on and make normally my life there.

As a result, I studied a lot every single day, I had try to pass the important exams, but I was failing. I realized it is not for me, maybe I do not have skills enough for this. Consequently I asked the teacher what I can do to improve ans he said is impossible, you will need to read all this book, which has maybe 200 pages, for one month more " Forget this Fernanda, that all you have to do the course next year ".

In the end, I read the biggest book and past every matter. I think that was the most difficult and challenging in my life.

Corrected

If I had to choose one especially challenging period in my life so far it would be my first semester at university. Although most people are very excited about the first day at university, for me was the toughest day of my life. The thing was, everyone else knew each other in this place. It was difficult to make friends, because I was from the other part of the city and they were almost all from the same place and school too. But I really loved my career dreams so I had to move on and make the best of my life there.

To begin with I studied a lot every single day. I had to pass the important exams, but I was struggling. I started to feel it was not for me and maybe I did not have enough talent for this. So asked the teacher what I could do to improve. He said  “forget this Fernanda – you’ll have to repeat the course again next year.”

There was a book, which had about 200 pages, that I’d have to read in one month. In the end, I read the book and passed every subject. I think that was the most difficult and challenging in my life.

Corrected

I think that one of the most challenging periods of my life so far would be last year, when every aspect of my life basically changed from one day to the next.

I used to live in an apartment in Paris with my best friend. We were both studying in the same school and were interning at the same time. Many of my very close friends were also in Paris at the time. Then I graduated and finished my internship. While some of my friends were offered jobs at the end of their internship, I did not. My roommate didn’t either, so she decided to leave for a gap year as an au pair in the United States. As a result, we had to leave our apartment.

So in effect I went from being independent, working in a great firm and being surrounded by friends to being back at my parents', unemployed and quite lonely. This period was particularly hard because despite the fact that I had always been a hard worker and a joyful person,  it felt like I’d failed to succeed at some points and it led up to a lack of self-confidence regarding every area of my life.

As I happened to suddenly have a lot of free time, I started to go the gym quite a lot. Eventually, this really helped me to get my self-esteem back and I began to feel more and more confident every day. After some time, I finally decided to use this free time to achieve something that I always wanted to do but had always been afraid of doing: travel abroad on my own for several months. And this is how I ended up here in New Zealand.

Orignial

The most challenging time on my life was when I dropped out medical school after been there for a year and half. Everyone was calling me doctor when I was there, my parents, cousins and friends. I had to change my major for different reasons. First I didn’t like it, the other reason was I got low marks for it .

After I decided to study IT (information technology) and dropped medical school everybody was despondent especially my family and when people ask me about I used to feel guilty about it. Furthermore, I didn’t find any kind of support even though it was my decision and my future !

However, I started new page studying what I like, which was more interesting to me than being in medical field. Moreover, I was really good and creative at Information Security, I graduated with first class honor which was surprising. Furthermore, I started working with huge company called Cisco when I was twenty years old, then I got an offer from Microsoft with dubal salary When I was twenty two years old, which could be a great proof of success,  . Nowadays I’m an Security Information Specialist, also preparing my self to study master degree in Cyber Security in New Zealand.

With some Adjectives of Emotion:

The most challenging and frustrating times of my life was when I dropped out of medical school having been there for a year and a half. Everyone was calling me doctor when I was there - my parents, cousins and friends. I felt nervous, guilty and regretful. But I had to change my major for two reasons. Firstly I felt annoyed, confused and enraged whenever I studied it and secondly I got low marks.

After I decided to study IT (information technology) and dropped medical school everybody was despondent and confused. I wouldn't say they were angry, just disillusioned and perplexed - especially my family - and when people asked me about it, I used to feel ashamed. Furthermore, I didn’t find any kind of support even though it was my decision and my future!

Original

My name is Hoon. I like my name and my style as I called Hoon style. When I was young my Father always said ‘Think everything simply’. I followed his advice and it is one of the most important my standard until now. As a kids, Everything were really curious to me and I was have many little adventure with my friends. Also, In the adventure I could meet a lot of obstacles. At that every single moment I reminded my Father’s advice and just followed. As a result, Although I was little boy , I could overcome all of obstacles quite well with some injuries. Moreover when I became a 19years old, I have to go Military Service for finished my duty. It was quite tough time in my life. From what I know , Army required strong patient and get used to command system. However I was not afraid about spending my precise time in Army because at that time I was totally easy going person who have simple thinking.

After finished basic military training my practical military life was started I mean it time to start real challenging. Also everything were different and hard to me like freshman. If I give example , such as do something without my motivation. It was worst thing to me.

Corrected

My name is Hoon. I like my name and my style, which I call “Hoon” style. When I was young my father always said ‘Think about everything as simply as you can’. I followed his advice and it is my standard way of dealing with any problem.

As a kid, everything was really curious to me and I had many little adventures with my friends. During these adventures I met a lot of obstacles. And at each point I’d be reminded of my father’s simple advice and just follow it. As a result, although I was little boy, I was able to overcome all sorts of obstacles quite well, though with some injuries.

When I turned a 19 I had to do Military Service. It was quite a tough time in my life. The army required inner strength, patience and obedience. But I was not afraid of spending my precious time in army because at that time I was easy going and I had the simple thinking attitude my father had taught me.

Original

The toughest time I’ve ever had was definitely when I had to write my first big assignment. Although I’ve started really early with the writing part, I totally underrated all the required research. In order to fully understand autism I had to read many books so that I could observe the behavior of the little child. There were many moments when I was unable to cope with all the given information. However I had a deadline and my mentor kept pushing me to achieve my goal. Eventually I found my motivation again, due to the big improvements of the little boy. His achievements have made me believe in myself and once my assignment was finished, I was filled with pride because I could document his big personal development.

Corrected

The toughest time I’ve ever had was definitely when I had to write my first big assignment when I was studying autism. Although I’d started with the writing part really early, I totally underestimated all the required research. In order to fully understand autism I had to read many books so that I could observe the behavior of a little child. There were many moments when I was unable to cope with all the information given. However, I had a deadline and my mentor kept pushing me to achieve my goal. Eventually I found my motivation again, thanks to the big improvements in the little boy. His achievements made me believe in myself and once my assignment was finished, I was filled with pride because I could document his big personal development.

Original

The most challenging time I’ve ever had was certainly last year. Indeed, after that I had graduated from the university I decided that it was the time for me to pass the big test which allows access to the lawyer school.

I knew that I will devote myself to my revision for four long months and my parents put on my shoulders an enormous pressure. So that, I really wanted to carry off this test and made them proud of me. My psychological state during the revision was really bad because of my pessimism. Moreover, I was the only person in my group of friends who past the test.  It’s certainly why I felt so alone while this period.

Although this feeling I decided that I had a strong will to succeed in this experience. I started to study hard and tried to don’t think about the pressure so that I said to me “if you failed it is ok but if you don’t want have any regrets about that you have to work now”.

Finally, I passed the test and it was finally a success. Despite my fear, I didn’t give up and today I’m really happy about that because if I didn’t past the test last year I will not be in Auckland today.

Corrected

The most challenging time I’ve ever had was certainly last year. After I had graduated from the university I decided that it was the time for me to sit the big test which allows access to the law school.

I knew that I would devote myself to my revision for four long months and my parents put an enormous pressure on my shoulders. I really wanted to carry off this test and make them proud of me. My psychological state during the revision was really bad because of my pessimism about it all. Moreover, I was the only person in my group of friends who was sitting the test. That’s certainly why I felt so alone during this period.

Despite this feeling I decided that I had a strong will to succeed in this endeavour. I started to study hard and tried not to think about the pressure. I said to myself “if you fail it is okay, but if you don’t want have any regrets about that you have to work now”.

Finally, I passed the test and it was a success. Despite my fear, I didn’t give up and today I’m really happy about that because if I hadn’t passed the test last year I would not be in Auckland today.

Corrected

I would say the most challenging period in my life was when I took part in Taste of Japan. This was a festival where people experienced Japanese culture and traditions. I thought it would be a good opportunity to make use of my English, and I also joined to support the Japanese performers (who played bamboo flute). They could not speak English at all, so I needed to interpret for audiences before they played.

I had thought they would make a script which had what they wanted to say. But they didn’t. What’s more, they said “we want you to translate what we are saying from Japanese into English and we will decide it on the spot as soon as we stand in a stage.” I was really upset and nervous because I found this job was much more difficult and challenging than I’d anticipated. I got the program only fifteen minutes before they performed and there was not enough time to collect information about each piece.

Not surprisingly, my first interpretation resulted in complete failure and I lost confidence in my English. I mumbled and used a lot of fillers and the audience could tell I was nervous.

Fortunately, the performers told me they were going to have same programs and there was enough time before the second and third show started. That way I was able to predict what they were going to say. I summarized the backgrounds of each song and practiced what I would do on the stage.

The second interpretation went better and the third one was even better and I regained confidence.

This was a great memory and experience, but to tell the truth, I don’t want to repeat it.  

Original 

The most challenging period in my life was when I had that quit my the school where I worked for five years and decide come to New Zealand for study English and live a new experience far away of my parents.

Firstly it was a really hard challenge because I used to live with my parents and in addition to I am only child. Secondly the job that I left was my first job after University for this reason had a special importance for me. Finally I think that the way how I managed the situation was trying every time to move on, getting the best of this new experience, learning more about myself and understanding that the life is made of big changes.

In conclusion I think that was a great experience in my life, if need quit another job in the future for follow my dreams and being happy out site of my comfort zone, I will be happy of do it again.

Corrected

The most challenging period in my life was when I had that quit the school where I worked for five years and decide come to New Zealand to study English and have a new experience far away of my parents.

Firstly it was a really hard challenge because I was used to living with my parents and in addition to that, I am an only child. Secondly, the job that I left was my first job after University and for this reason had a special importance for me.

I think that the way I managed the challenge was trying every time to move on, getting the best of this new experience, learning more about myself and understanding that life is made of big changes.*

(*This is a good sentence, very English!)

I think that was a great experience in my life. And if I ever need quit another job in the future to follow my dreams and be happy outside of my comfort zone, I will be happy of do it again.*

(*Another very authentic sentence – great work)

Corrected

I think that one of the most challenging setbacks that I have had to overcome was when I had to stop playing tennis because of my right foot injury. I was about fourteen years old and I fell down the stairs at school. I thought I was fine and I didn't go to the doctor. That day, my foot wouldn't stop hurting, so that was the moment when I finally decided to go to the doctor. Afterwards, she told me I had suffered a sprain and I really needed to get to the hospital just to make sure I hadn't fractured a ligament. I went to the hospital, and two hours later the doctor told my dad that my ligament was nearly broken but thankfully it wasn't, so I would need to wear a boot for a month and afterwards go to physio. He also told my dad that I couldn't train for at least two months, that ligaments are difficult to mend.

After those two horrible months of barely having the capacity to walk, I went back to the doctor hoping that I was fine, but I didn't pass the resistance test, so I needed more time in physio. I spent almost four months without training and it was really hard no to do something productive, something that I really loved. Anyway, after that time, I went back to the tennis court happier than ever.

Original

Few years ago, I was part of a musical band as an accordionist and we used to play on week-ends in concerts or traditional dances. One day, a famous traditional band offered us the chance to play on the first part of their concert. It was a great opportunity and we had a much bigger audience than usual. As the stage had to be prepared for the band, we had to sit on the edge of the stage to play our music.

I was wearing a long skirt, and as a result, when I picked up myself after playing, I stepped on my skirt and stumbled, falling down on the audience. I was so ashamed and I swore that I would never play on a stage again.

In my music school, everybody reminded me of the accident and laughed. I stayed a long time without playing in my band. Fortunately, the members of my band helped me feel better and encourage me and I consequently played again few times after.

Now it makes me laugh but in that time, I was really mortified. 

Corrected

A few years ago I was part of a musical band as an accordionist and we used to play on weekends in concerts or traditional dances. One day, a famous traditional band offered us the chance to play on the first part of their concert. It was a great opportunity and we had a much bigger audience than usual.

As the stage had to be prepared for the band, we had to sit on the edge of the stage to play our music. I was wearing a long skirt, and as a result, when I picked up myself after playing, I stepped on my skirt and stumbled, falling down on the audience. I was so ashamed and I swore that I would never play on a stage again.

In my music school everybody reminded me of the accident and laughed. I stayed a long time without playing. Fortunately, the members of my band helped me feel better and encouraged me and I eventually got playing again again.

Now it makes me laugh, but at the time I was really mortified.