(Student Writing - B1.3 level) Ojigi - Bow (by Kimie)

Teacher's note: First of all, thank you Kimie. I really admire how brave and determined you are in using my stupid language so expressively and generously. I can't even make one sentence in Japanese so you should be very very proud of your abilities in my language. 

In Japan there's a unique greeting custom: “ojigi”. You may know it a_ “bowing” in English. All Japanese understand how to bow from childhood. It's quite natural. We ___ this gesture not only to greet, but also to apologise and ___ expressing gratitude.

You can see people bowing anywhere, any time. Actually, if you think about it, it's a really funny custom. But we’re not kidding at all. “Ojigi” as a custom is expresses truly Japanese values. We express our feelings with a bow.

In general, people bow with respect and a warm mind. One thing that is important is the bowing angle. There are three ____ of different angles which express three meanings.

1. “Eshaku”  

This light bow is for informal greeting_ (bowing angle: about 15 degrees). We usually use this standard form instead of saying “Hello!”

2.  “Keirei” 

This is a general formal bow. It can express greeting or apology (bowing angle: about 30 degrees).

3. “Saikeirei”

This deepest bow is highly effective in showing respect or offering a deep apology (bowing angle: about 45 degrees)

Saikeirei is not used very often. Only when needed.

The Japanese place a lot of importance on pleasing others. If you visit Japan, you may notice that people are very friendly and polite there! After leaving, you may want to come back to Japan, and also you might keep on bowing in NZ!

- Kimie

Compare the original text: see how many changes you can find.

Uncorrected text

In Japan has a unique greet custom as you may know it called “Ojigi” “Bow” in English

We usually use this gesture so as to greet, not only greeting but also it can be shown apology and expressing gratitude as well.

All Japanese have understood how to bow since we were child. That’s quite natural

You can look at  people who are bowing anywhere everywhere at any time.

Actually, if you think about that…that’s really funny.

But we’re not kidding at all .that’ why Japanese value “Ojigi” as a custom.

All people express our feeling with bow.

In general, people bow with respect and warm mind equally important is bowing angle.

There is three of different angle which mean different degrees of bow has a different mean about three ways of expressing.

*A light bow called “Eshaku” is for informal greeting (bowing angle, about 15 degrees)

“Hello!” usually we use this standard form instead of saying “Hello!”

*The other one a general bow called “Keirei” is formal. 

It can express greeting or showing apology to someone (bowing angle, about 30degrees)

*And one more a deep bow called “Saikeirei”

We think this way should highly effective against showing respect or telling deep apology (bowing angle, about 45 degrees)

We don’t use very often just use it when it’s needed.

People pay a lot of attention to give others satisfaction in Japan

If you visit to Japan, you may notice that People are very friendly and polite there!

After you leaving, you may want to come back to Japan and also you might bow in NZ!

kimie