(Advanced) Student Writing

The mission of

his sense of justice

by Simon Schroers

He knew that his planned project equaled playing with fire. The unveilings(1) that Edward intended to publish on the next day would change his life from scratch(2). All his professional, social and even family achievements would get lost(3) for a significant period of time. Either he would be hailed as a hero by American society or it would despise him – that made him afraid. But he was sure he had to tell the whole world the truth about the criminality of the US secret service. His employer, the National Security Agency, had cheated millions of people, governments and companies around the world by spying, hacking and saving their data. 

“Edward, please start eating,” his girlfriend Lindsay whispered at him while washing already(4) her dishes. He was completely lost in thought. “Yes, I will.” That was all he could say at this moment because he could only think about his future life after the revelations on the coming day. Lindsay felt uncertainty(5) as well, but she tried to give the impression to Edward that she was not able to see the full extent of the situation. Besides, how should she know? He had not told anybody so far. Only the journalist Glen Greenwald with whom Edward arranged(6) a meeting knew that he wanted to reveal confidential information.

After eating sluggishly only half of his meal – usually one serving was not enough for him, not by a long chalk – he went to bed the earliest he had for a very long time. Nevertheless, he was not able to sleep – his brain did not stop to think(7) about his new stage of life.

On the next day he went with Lindsay to Glen to give an exclusive interview. He did not want to do it alone; she was his support. While listening curiously to Edward’s information Glen knew that this would be the scoop of his life. He was surprised how much secret information Edward Snowden had found(8) over the last eight years while working for the CIA and NSA. Edward’s initial excitement vanished with the beginning of the conversation completely(10). He considered his unveilings as a duty – he could not stop talking about the crimes the secret service had committed for many years. But he did not reveal it because of a hatred towards the United States of America but because he believed in his country so he had to tell the truth. Patriotism underpinned his belief, the oath on its constitution assured it. Therefore, his conscience was clear.

After the publication of Glen’s article this feeling towards his country got more and more confused. Suddenly Edward was the utmost(11) criminal of America. For the government he was no longer a real citizen of their country. Being considered as a mass murderer made him sad. Edward had believed in this government at the assumption of office, but nothing had changed. He had seen no other option than revealing that millions of private communications had been saved illegally in a project named PRISM.

All at once he did not feel safe anymore in his country although he got great support from some parts of the society. He looked at Lindsay and said, “I cannot stay here. I am so sorry but I have to leave.” “I will follow you wherever you go, even Russia!” she answered. So it happened that they sought and granted(12) asylum in Moscow. 

The American government and secret service had to take responsibility globally for their machinations. Many international friendships got harmed and the confidence in the United States got deservedly damaged – all thanks to the courage of one man: Edward Snowden.

Teacher corrections:

1. revelations

2. for good

3. be lost

4. already washing

5. the (sense of) uncertainty

6. had arranged

7. wouldn't stop thinking

8. gathered

9. completely vanished

10. actions

11. worst

12. were granted

Comment

It was Simon's own idea to write this account of factual events in a fictional style. He's used lots of dialogue to add life to the piece, which is harder than it might seem. He also manages to get across the inner thoughts and motivations of the three characters. Finally, the piece manages to convey Simon's views on the controversy in a non-confrontational, human way. Really great stuff.

G